A good friend, David Patterson, lost his battle with lung cancer today. I guess lost isn’t the right word. I don’t know what the right word is. I hate the word lost. Didn’t have enough time to beat his cancer? I don’t know. Dave’s prognosis wasn’t good and within 5 short months of being diagnosed he is gone and it’s a fucking shame. Dave never smoked a day in his life and I’m not dumb enough to think that the only way you get cancer is from smoking. I had planned to see him 6 days prior, but his wife had to cancel as it was a bad day for him. That same day I had lunch with a friend who had seen him and it was bad. At that point I decided to not see him again……the right decision, but I wanted to see my friend. I felt and still feel like I abandoned him. I know he wouldn’t know who I was. He was drugged up. I chose not to see him because I wanted my last memory of him to be our lunch at Geaghan’s a few weeks before. I sort of knew I would be saying goodbye that day, but I couldn’t let myself make the conversation go that way. I guess I was still in denial about everything. I chose not to believe any of this fucking shitty diagnosis. A great person, mentor, coach who didn’t deserve this. Nor did his family deserve this. Nobody deserves this. I couldn’t believe any of it. I still don’t want to believe it. I just keep staring at my phone going over our last text messages….our last E-Mails. people say everything happens for a reason……so what’s the fucking great reason for this to happen? I’d love to hear it…….and that’s what sucks. There is no reason for it to happen to Dave or to anybody. I don’t believe in the afterlife or any of that bullshit, but if for some reason dave can see this……I love you man and until we meet again…………